Do You Ever

get so excited about a certain burger or other-kind-of-fast-food-item-with-a-wrapper that you bite in without thinking, only realizing too late that you forgot to take off the wrapper? And then you realize that there’s a bit of paper (or even worse, aluminum foil) in your mouth, and then you wonder whether you should stop chewing but then you realize that in your enthusiasm you’ve already chewed the piece of wrapper into little pieces so it’s not really worth it? You’re wondering if anyone will notice that the rest of your wrapper has a bite-shaped chunk missing, so you look around, but then you realize that you’re drawing more attention to yourself, so you just continue on with your meal, hoping that you’ll finish fast enough so that you can toss the wrapper in the trash without anyone noticing? You swear to yourself never to make the same mistake again, but you realize that it’s the third time this week you’ve done it, so instead you make a compromise with yourself not to make the same mistake at least with aluminum foil wrappers, since you’re pretty certain that your body couldn’t digest that stuff, and besides, you’ve learned from your childhood that chewing aluminum foil is one of the worst things to chew on, and if you didn’t learn it from personal experience, you probably learned about it from that one Animorphs book where they turn into sharks to infiltrate an underwater Yeerk base guarded by Hork Bajir but then the Animorphs run (swim) into a electric forcefield or something (while they’re sharks) and Rachel remarks that it’s like biting into aluminum foil while wearing braces? Okay, maybe that was a bit too specific. But you know, it’s just one of those things, right?


3 responses to “Do You Ever

  1. the one thing i hate about dürüm döner, besides the number of umlauts it has, is that it comes wrapped in aluminum foil.

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